“Did God put you together?” When I ask that question of a married couple, they almost always say yes. Then I ask “Why did He put you together?” 

I get blank stares. 

We believe God made us for each other, but many of us have no idea why. Helping couples discover God’s purpose for their marriage is one of the things I am most passionate about. It can absolutely transform your relationship. 

Here are three things I want you to know: 

In five years, you will not be the same. 

Better or worse, you’ll be different. 

Success happens on purpose and never by accident. 

To reach a certain point in your marriage, you’ll have to work at it. 

In marriage, success only happens if you’re both committed to the same purpose. 

Amos 3:3 asks “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” If you’re not in agreement, your marriage—the longest journey of your life—will be a constant challenge. 

Keeping those facts in mind, I want you to know that finding the purpose for your marriage means starting with the big questions. Not “Where will we live?” or “How many kids should we have?” but “Why are we here?” 

The answer is simple. God created us for relationship, to have a relationship with Him and a relationship with each other. This is reflected in Jesus’ teaching about the two greatest commandments: to love God and to love people. Relationships are why we exist, and He wants us to have successful relationships. 

On the other hand, the devil wants to destroy relationships by either separating us from God or separating us from each other—especially from our spouse. Satan is always trying to divide. 

One way he divides is by separation. 

We see this in Genesis with Adam and Eve. God put them in a perfect paradise, but Satan convinces them that God was evil. He accuses God. He tries to divide Adam and Eve from God. And by speaking first to Eve, he divides Adam and Eve from each other. 

He does this to couples today in so many different ways. 

The second thing the devil does is substitution. 

He shows the fruit to Adam and Eve and tells them they didn’t need God; they only need the fruit. Today, He makes us believe things will make us happier: money, a new job, a new spouse. He is always trying to get us to substitute things for our marriage or for God. 

Separation and substitution are the Devil’s schemes for marriage. But God’s plan for marriage is relationship—to bring us closer to our spouse, and to bring us closer to Him. His plan for our life is that we love Him and love people, especially our family. 
Satan’s plan is to make us lonely and divided and always unsatisfied. We end up chasing after things. 

God’s plan is for us to pursue Him and pursue relationship. The opportunity to love God and each other is the reason God put you together. It doesn’t get any more complicated than that. 

Jimmy Evansas
„Marriage Today“ founder

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