Sex before marriage

Sex before marriage

Why is sex so much more attractive before or outside of marriage then it is within it?  
 
Is this honest question a good one to ask amongst Christians? Often times this is what people believe and think, but simply don’t say it out loud. They silently meditate over these questions, because talking about them is seen as “unholy” and “inappropriate”. However, open and honest questions have never scared God. In fact, it is quite the opposite, He is waiting for us to take these first steps, so that He could share His thoughts and wisdom about such issues, with us, taking us deeper into the truth that He shares with us in His Word. 
 
In response to the opening question, I would like to start by saying that the belief that sex before marriage (or within a relationship that doesn’t even lead to marriage) is vital for every human being,- is a very popular and widespread mindset in our society today. Young people start having sexual relationships from the early ages of 13 and 14- they are actively taught about contraception and how to avoid unplanned pregnancy, and sex has become a topic that is discussed very publicly, and seen everywhere: in movies, advertisements etc. And the idea that you should enter into a marriage without having any “experience” or not seeing if you and your partner are “compatible”, seems almost frightening. Nowadays, talking about saving yourself for marriage is seen as very rare and unpopular, while others simply do not think a person’s virginity and purity are things to be preserved or valued. 
 
My aim isn’t to portray sex as something bad, shameful or something to hide away from. Sex was actually given to humanity as a gift from God! “Adam made love to his wife Eve, and she became pregnant…” (Genesis 4:1) That’s right, the Creator of the heavens and earth, who we know as God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, created people in a way that their primary physical needs would be met this way, and that this would be what pleasured them. Everyone knows that a healthy and balanced diet, is what our bodies need to feel good, or that rest is vital for us to stay healthy and feel energised and happy. Open and honest communication and relationships are also what we desperately need in order to stay sane- hence why we live in families and communities, to avoid the fear of being alone or separated from the outside world. 
 
Sex is no different- it is of equally high value to a person, something that delights us and fulfills our lives. Because of it, new generations, families, communities and even nations are formed. So why is it that we cannot enjoy it freely, when, where and with who we so please? 
 
The interesting part is that when God created us, from the moment we are born, He placed in us certain needs that need to be met in order for us to survive, such as: food, the affection and comfort of someone who loves us, sleep and rest. Sexual intimacy is something that comes along a lot later down the line, when a person begins to mature and starts to gradually understand who they are as an individual. This means that there comes a specific time in a person’s life when their interest and engagement in sexuality begins. 
 
For instance, let’s compare sex to fire- fire is very useful and sometimes necessary, yet also something that is mesmerising and almost beautiful, but only while it is safe. A fire’s warmth has been something treasured by people from the very beginning- fire is also seen as a symbol of comfort and safety. It is always nice to remember those precious moments spent together with friends and family in front of a camp fire, or sitting down together in the comfort of our homes, the warmth of candles or a fireplace burning, creating that peaceful and comforting feeling. 
 
However, this same thing that brought joy, can also cause great havoc and fear when left out of control. It seems like only yesterday that the 2017 tragedy of the fire of Grenfell Tower happened, with people jumping from windows, and fear and devastation all around. 71 people died that night, 203 people lost their loved ones and their homes. This kind of fire is frightening, and shows us just how quickly it can ruin and destroy everything in its path. 
 
So, it seems that we understand that fire and water require boundaries, yet what are the correct boundaries for sex and how do we keep to them? God’s word provides us with a very simple answer, returning us back to His wisdom in creating us. In the gospel of Matthew, Jesus says: ““Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”” (Matthew 19: 4-6) 
 
Here, Jesus talks about the union of two people, or how we would understand it today- marriage. The Bible clearly shows us that the boundaries for sex lie within a marriage- when two people (a husband and wife) become one flesh, and that His plan is for us to have one marriage, and one sexual partner throughout our lives.  
 
So, let’s return back to our original question- why is sex so much more attractive before or outside of marriage? Well, just like in the garden of Eden, why was Eve so drawn to the one fruit that was forbidden, and not to what she was allowed to eat? We cannot forget that we are constantly face to face with the one who is a master of seduction and persuasion, who shows us only a part of the truth, in order to deceive us. When talking about sex before marriage, one vital thing is very easily missed- that sex is not just a physical act, having no other consequences. When a person comes together with someone physically, they are giving not only their bodies, but their emotions, forming subconscious “soul ties”, that are much more powerful then we think. They bind people’s hearts and souls together, leaving behind a part of them that they can never get back. This not only refers to a broken heart, negative emotions or relationship experiences, but to the soul ties that remain with us, restraining us, and preventing us from moving forward into healthy relationships. To some extent it can be said, that every sexual experience poisons a person’s soul, and hardens their heart, when each relationship ends. And even if they don’t end, but the couple does not enter into a marriage, this still negatively affects their quality of life.  
 
A study by Harvard University shows that: 
1. Women who marry and do not get divorced: 
a) are less likely to suffer from depression, compared to those women who do not marry or just cohabit with a partner; 
b) are less likely to become the victims of crime; 
c) are less likely to experience domestic abuse or violence; 
d) have a higher self-worth. 
2. Men who marry and do not get divorced: 
a) earn more money (though they have the same qualifications as those who aren’t married); 
b) live longer; 
c) have a higher self-worth then those who aren’t married or live with their partner; 
d) are less likely to get sick or injure themselves. 
 
We can come to one conclusion, that people who live according to God’s plan and marry, and aim to maintain this marriage- are seemingly happier and much more successful. 
 
Now, just how enjoyable sexual intimacy is within a marriage, ultimately depends on the quality of the relationship between the couple. If there is respect, understanding, honesty and the feeling of safety and security among them. The purpose of sex is to fulfill your spouse’s needs and not the other way around- to seek your own satisfaction and pleasure at the expense of the other person. This is something that is completely unnatural to our egocentric fleshly nature- and will require our efforts to learn and practice. However, if couples individually live in relationship with God, they will grow closer together, and will experience greater intimacy, grow more sensitive to each other’s needs, have greater respect for one another, and naturally experience more pleasurable sexual intimacy. And likewise, the opposite will happen- if a marriage is full of disrespect, arguments, misunderstanding, hurt and unforgiveness. This kind of relationship pushes couples apart, and enjoying sexual intimacy is not even a question, due to the distance that has been created between them. That is why I believe that when people do not maintain a healthy and loving relationship with their spouse, they allow the myth of sex being more pleasurable before marriage to stay alive. Though in reality, this is not the case at all. 
 
 

“Differences are a blessing” 
 
In my garden, I had planted two small hydrangeas into two wooden flower pots, that I had recently bought from a flower shop. I then placed them outside, near the windows looking out to my garden. They had once flowered beautifully, but now, for the past few months they simply grew new leaves, but no flowers were in sight. I started to think about getting rid of them, as the beauty I was expecting from them, was nowhere to be seen. “It’s probably a bad type of plant”- I decided. 
 
Around the same time, bugs had ruthlessly begun to destroy one of my other beautiful plants, that despite my efforts, I was unable to save. The chemicals I had used killed the bugs, but the plant was still too weak to be saved and I had to throw it away. I was left with an empty flower pot, full of soil, which I didn’t want to throw away, because here in England, soil and compost can only be bought. So this pot remained outside, and during Autumn and Winter, the rainy seasons had left the soil overly damp and seemingly damaged. 
 
When Spring came, I decided it was time to tend to my garden again, and I began by replanting the two hydrangeas- one of them into the flower pot with the old soil I mentioned above. I really had no other options and didn’t want to spend money on new soil and flower pots. After a few weeks, I noticed that this very plant began to change, and very quickly began to spout new long shoots, grow new leaves and soon, began to flower. This same plant was almost unrecognisable, standing tall and proud, beautiful and majestic. The other hydrangea was also changing and growing more beautiful, but nothing in comparison to the first. 

As I watched all this happening before me, I began to think, that if I had thrown away the old soil, it would not have created such a magical result- it had just the right acidity level that the hydrangea needed, and it would never have become my garden’s most beautiful plant. Instead, they took from each other what the other needed- the plant needed the soil’s abundant moisture to flourish, and the soil, after giving away it’s abundance, became fertile and was able to bring new life. 
 
Is this not the same in our lives? When two unique individuals come together and form a family, they give each other what the other person lacks and needs. Though these two people may be completely different- (one may be of calmer temperament, dislike change and need more time to make decisions, and the other fiery, energetic and needing change), they are able to complement one another, giving, without making demands, and sacrificing themselves to serve the other person. When this happens, is it not likely that both of these individuals will flourish, and live a wholesome life, enjoying it to the full? In these moments, is God’s wisdom not the most apparent- that we are called to serve, help and support others in times of need, instead of trying to change the people closest to us into what we think they should be? It seems that two completely different things (like the damaged, overly damp soil and the lifeless plant in my story), can come together and create something perfect. Without the opportunity to complement one another in such a way, neither would have fulfilled their potential, and together, become the beautiful creation that I can now enjoy every single day. 
 
“Always rejoice” 
 
“Then my soul will rejoice in the Lord and delight in his salvation.” (Psalm 35: 9) 
 
Do you find yourself still able to stay at peace and rejoice when you hear a doctor’s terrifying diagnosis; when your teenager doesn’t come home at night; when your neighbours go on holiday and you on the other hand, have recently lost your job; when you need to move out of your home but have nowhere to go? 
 
Nothing can satisfy us and renew our strength like a personal word from God given to us each new day, or an encounter with the Holy Spirit. It is at these times when we truly realise the goodness of God, though our circumstances may only get worse, we must trust that He will keep His promises, and his help and protection will not pass us by and come at just the right time. When we take that step of faith, as though walking on water and yet cling to God, trusting that He will be with us and fulfill all that He has promised- that is when we experience true freedom. We are not only no longer afraid to drown, but we can be refreshed by the water, our strength is renewed- and we can experience true peace and rest, in the situations that seemed impossible to overcome in our lives. 
 
If we feel as though the battle is just too hard to fight alone, let’s allow God to fight for us and do the impossible that only He can do- and we will be saved and refreshed like never before. “ ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. Tomorrow march down against them. They will be climbing up by the Pass of Ziz, and you will find them at the end of the gorge in the Desert of Jeruel. You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.’ ” (2 Chronicles 20: 15-17) 
 
Don’t ever forget that the joy of the Lord is our strength! And no matter what happens in our lives, let’s continue to pray that God would be our firm foundation- the one whom we can trust. 
 

Jurate Kapacinskiene

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How to be successful

How to be successful

We all want to be healthy, motivated, prosperous in all aspects of life – in other words, simply successful. So then why is it that not all of us are successful, even when we say we believe in the Almighty God. Why does it seem like God blesses some more than others? Can it be that God is wrong and unfair? God is in no way ever unfair and He loves all of His children and takes care of them the same. In His word, He clearly says, “Long ago the Lord said to Israel: ‘I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself’” (Jeremiah 31:3). If God has done everything He can from His side for us to live a wholesome life, that means that there is still something for us to do from our side of things on which a lot depends on. From here I would like to separate three essential things which are all extremely important for us believers wanting to see Gods victory and glory in our lives.  

 

  1. Genuine and persevering work. 

Whether we like it or not God appointed humans to work. “The Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and watch over it.” (Genesis 2:15). Without the first purpose – to get to know your Creator, every person has their own job which we should be doing genuinely, from our heart and diligently. It doesn’t matter at all how old you are or what your occupation is, the Bible teaches us the Godly principles of success: “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people” (Colossians 3:23). “And do everything with love” (1 Corinthians 16:14). God created humans to work, create, discover, come up with and think of, look after and make a routine out of it – we are all created according to God’s image.  

 

We are not created to be lazy or to sit in one spot forever. An individual feels happy and fulfilled doing something as well as creating and making something out of it. Everyone’s hidden treasure – the ability to work as well as implement what we don’t yet see; “A hard worker has plenty of food, but a person who chases fantasies has no sense” (Proverbs 12:11). “Wealth from get-rich-quick schemes quickly disappears, wealth from hard work grows over time (Proverbs 13:11).  

 

Does this mean that if I work anything and without resting I’ll be successful? Well a stick has two endings, that’s why having a job just to work or having a job just to become rich, won’t bring success or satisfaction. Where does your success lie? Our creator knows the best, He showed us and left us a a perfect example of working and resting – 6 days of work and 1 day of rest. This leads us onto the second point I have.  

 

  1. Obedience to God. 

Only getting to know God deeper and more personally and having a deeper relationship will we get to know and understand Gods will for us much more, as well as hearing His voice and trusting in Him like we would in a good father, and be obedient to Him. Working hard and sincerely from the heart alongside searching for His will and guidance we will await success with amazing results that will come from it. “Commit your actions to the Lord and your plans will succeed” (Proverbs 16:3). If you work honestly and without cheating, pay your taxes, not use others but instead take care of those weaker than us, generously help and serve others, not even just for the pay check but just to help another in need and be sensitive to what God says, success is bound to come your way.  

 

Not all of our ideas and understandings can and will come into existence for the simple reason that you are not created and put on this earth for every single one of your ideas. Often times, we ourselves don’t even know what we are successful at and what we succeed in and are good at, until you come across certain situations. However, God knows and even appointed us to accomplish certain things. “For we are Gods’ masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he has planned for us long ago” (Ephesians 2:10). We should be  communicating regularly with God, asking Him for His guidance and His will for us in our everyday jobs and activities. 

Sometimes God uses all of our surroundings, at times even when we feel like we are being affected painfully and are in extreme suffering. Suffering is in no way Gods ultimate plan for us but sometimes God will use it to get rid of our stubbornness and pride. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.” (Proverbs 3:5-6). “‘For I know the plans I have for you’ says the Lord. ‘They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope’” (Jeremiah 29:11). 

 

Raising my own kids, I clearly see that one may need much harder surroundings and higher demands, whereas all the other may need could be one word of asking them, in order for them to achieve what they need to achieve. My heart, as a mother, rejoices when my children are I see my children are capable and I see them achieve certain tasks, even if they may need my help or touch at times. At the same time, I don’t rush to implement or bring into existence all of their ideas, desires and thoughts as I understand that some of their wants and desires can be harmful to them. Therefore, listening to and obeying Gods will as well as diligently and sincerely doing what is acceptable in Gods eyes, we will await and see great success. “And may the Lord our God show us his approval and make our efforts successful. Yes make our efforts successful!” (Psalms 90:17).  

 

  1. Educated and cultivated character. 

Finally we understand that at the end of life we will not be able to take anything along with us, whether we have earned it or achieved it, nothing that we see with our bare eye will come with us when we have reached the end of life. However, along with one of Gods’ initial purposes for each of us, the only thing we will take away with us from this life when we leave Earth is a changed and renewed inside as well as an educated character. And for every good work we do, God will reward us and nothing will go past Gods eyes without His knowledge. For that reason, let’s not stop working with all of our heart, soul and drive, let’s encourage one another because the ultimate goal and purpose is a lot bigger than we can imagine. “That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).  

 

A believers purpose and a guarantee of success will always be eternal life with God, our Creator. I come across a lot of people who have achieved a lot in their lives and are extremely successful, and they always admit that simply earned money or earthly treasures does not bring hope, or more success or even more joy to your life. However, doing hard jobs alongside God and searching for His will in everything we do, a soft and sensitive heart loving all those around us, a cultivated character – these are the things that are the biggest treasures, successes and achievements for us and to our Almighty God.  

Jūratė Kapacinskiene

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Should Christians Celebrate Halloween?

Should Christians Celebrate Halloween?

The air is getting freaky. The days are getting shorter. Halloween is around the corner. Americans are expected to spend $9.1 billion on Halloween. Costumers will spend $86.13 on average to gear up. According to World Book Encyclopedia, “Halloween developed from an ancient pagan festival celebrated by Celtic people over 2,000 years ago in the area that is now the U.K., Ireland, and Northern France. The festival was called ‘Samhain’ (pronounced SOW ehn), which means ‘summer’s end,’ and it marked the beginning of the dark winter season. It was celebrated around Nov. 1. In the ninth century, the Catholic Church established a new holiday‚ All Saint’s Day, also called All Hallows. ‘Hallow’ means ‘saint’ or ‘one who is holy.’ The evening before All Hallows was known as All Hallow’s Eve, which was eventually shortened to Halloween.” 

The founder of the church of satan, Anton Szandor LaVey, who is now deceased said, “Two major holidays, HALLOWEEN and Walpurgisnacht are celebrated by the Church of Satan. I am glad that Christian parents let their children worship the devil at least one night out of the year. Welcome to Halloween.” Wiccans celebrate 8 holidays. Most important one is Samhain (Halloween). Those who practice voodoo and other witchcraft see this event as sacred. What Easter and Christmas are to Christians, Halloween is to the occult world. 

After seeing people get delivered from demons on a regular basis and the damage demons cause to people, I don’t understand how anyone in their right mind can celebrate that. 

Why don’t I celebrate Halloween? Because it… 

  1. Promotes fear. As Christians, we celebrate faith. We are believers. We belong to the household of faith. We have a spirit of faith. We have the gift of faith, and are called to live lives of faith! Perfect love casts out fear, not celebrates it! 
  1. Promotes darkness. Jesus is the light of the world. We are called to be a light to this world. The Word of God is Light. Nothing about Christianity is darkness! Heaven will never be overshadowed by night. 
  1. Promotes death. The only death we remember is Jesus’. It defeated the grave and death. We believe in the cross, not a skull! 

 

If we imitate the world, we lose our distinction; if we isolate from the world, we lose our influence. Christians need to engage the culture if we expect to make an impact but the Bible is clear about not conforming to our culture. 

Pastor Vlad Savchuk   

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FORGIVENESS

FORGIVENESS

Why is forgiveness so important and vital for every believer? What do Jesus and the  Scripture Teach about forgiveness? 

 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins” (Mk 11, 25).  

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 Jn 1, 9).   
 
 “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (Mt  18, 21-22). 

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”(Luke 6, 37). 

There are many places in the Bible where it is stated that forgiveness is first needed for us, those who are angry or hurt. If we do not forgive those who have trespassed against us, we will not be forgiven ourselves. This means that we will be accused of not forgiving. We only make it worse for ourselves by being angry and unwilling to forgive. But when a friend betrays your trust, someone steals from you or hurts your family in any way, it seems so natural to get angry and want revenge for the injustice caused to you. 

To desire justice is one thing, but to carry anger in your heart, which in the long run always grows into bitterness and hatred, is another thing altogether. Some psychologists argue that not forgiving can affect you both emotionally and physically. For example, it can cause an increase in blood pressure, depression or other chronic diseases. And what about the harm that can be caused between husband and wife? The Bible reads, ”Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4, 32). Often, we hear someone who has forgiven has their physical illnesses healed by God. So, unforgiveness and anger that have been held for a long time are like a poison, it harms us physically. 

 

What does it mean to forgive? 

Forgiveness is a gift given to anyone that is hurt or has hurt someone. The Greek word in the Bible translates to “forgive”, literally means “let go”. Jesus himself prayed on the cross to his father: “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23, 34).  Jesus realised that people do not always understand what they are doing and what consequences it can cause. He prayed to his Father to forgive us, for he loved everyone, even those who had tortured and abused him. The Bible teaches that the foundation of true forgiveness is selfless love because it does not hold hurt. Forgiveness is a choice of free will, it does not relate to how big the guilt is or how hard the situation is, it is also not related to the feelings of a man or the emotional condition at the time. 

 

Is it easy to forgive? 

It does not say anywhere in the bible that you should only forgive when it is easy but when it’s hard you don’t. It is a simple fact that we need to forgive to be forgiven. It seems so easy, but in real life, it’s not that easy to do.  However, our pain or loss, should not speak louder than Gods divine truth. When we decide to forgive, we do not look at the pain, we simply choose the correct way out. It is always easier for me to forgive when I have poured out my heart to the Lord in prayer. I try to tell God about all my feelings and in the end, I always ask Him to help me forgive my perpetrators because I know that where I am still weak, He is strong.  

 

Is forgiving the same as forgetting and living as if nothing has happened? 

No not at all! Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. By forgiving, we do not expect what has been lost to be restored but trust must be rebuilt. If a husband or wife has lost trust in one another, that trust must be restored by taking very specific actions and putting in a conscious effort. “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper,but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.”(Pro 28, 13). It is not enough to confess your guilt alone; you need to stop making the same mistake. My forgiveness does not mean that I continue to let someone mistreat and exploit me.  

 

Forgiveness does not mean: 

       To accept inappropriate behaviour. Those who call evil deeds harmless or justify them are condemned in the Bible (See Isaiah 5, 20). 

       Pretend that nothing happened.  Although God forgave King David’s sins, He did not protect him from the consequences of the sinful behavior. The consequences of David’s sins was Gods will and are remembered to this day (see 2 Samual 12, 9-13). 

       Let people exploit you. For example,if you lend money to someone, but they waste that money and has no way of giving the money back to you; you forgive them and forget the debt, but this does not mean you should borrow the money again in the future (Psalm 37, 21; Also 14, 15; Galatians 6, 7).  

      Forgiving made up grievances. It is hard to admit that sometimes the pain and anger that we feel has no foundation. The Bible says,  Don’t become angry quickly, because anger is foolish.  (Ecclesiastes 7, 9).  

We need to forgive almost every day sometimes even a few times. It is no secret that if we do not forgive, we harden our hearts and the state of our heart is important to God. When we close the door to our heart to a person, we also close them to God, and when we forgive, we open our hearts again. Anger and resentment stop us, it prevents us from moving forward, we end up stuck in one place ceasing to mature and rejoice in the things that surround us. When we accept our neighbor as they are with all their faults, it is easier to be more forgiving. If we focus on what others did wrong, it is very easy to forget what they did that was good. Do we want to be like that? Remember, nobody is perfect, you are not the exception. Let us be sensitive and forgiving spirits, and let God be the judge. 

Jūratė Kapačinskienė

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The Reason You Are Together

The Reason You Are Together

“Did God put you together?” When I ask that question of a married couple, they almost always say yes. Then I ask “Why did He put you together?” 

I get blank stares. 

We believe God made us for each other, but many of us have no idea why. Helping couples discover God’s purpose for their marriage is one of the things I am most passionate about. It can absolutely transform your relationship. 

Here are three things I want you to know: 

In five years, you will not be the same. 

Better or worse, you’ll be different. 

Success happens on purpose and never by accident. 

To reach a certain point in your marriage, you’ll have to work at it. 

In marriage, success only happens if you’re both committed to the same purpose. 

Amos 3:3 asks “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” If you’re not in agreement, your marriage—the longest journey of your life—will be a constant challenge. 

Keeping those facts in mind, I want you to know that finding the purpose for your marriage means starting with the big questions. Not “Where will we live?” or “How many kids should we have?” but “Why are we here?” 

The answer is simple. God created us for relationship, to have a relationship with Him and a relationship with each other. This is reflected in Jesus’ teaching about the two greatest commandments: to love God and to love people. Relationships are why we exist, and He wants us to have successful relationships. 

On the other hand, the devil wants to destroy relationships by either separating us from God or separating us from each other—especially from our spouse. Satan is always trying to divide. 

One way he divides is by separation. 

We see this in Genesis with Adam and Eve. God put them in a perfect paradise, but Satan convinces them that God was evil. He accuses God. He tries to divide Adam and Eve from God. And by speaking first to Eve, he divides Adam and Eve from each other. 

He does this to couples today in so many different ways. 

The second thing the devil does is substitution. 

He shows the fruit to Adam and Eve and tells them they didn’t need God; they only need the fruit. Today, He makes us believe things will make us happier: money, a new job, a new spouse. He is always trying to get us to substitute things for our marriage or for God. 

Separation and substitution are the Devil’s schemes for marriage. But God’s plan for marriage is relationship—to bring us closer to our spouse, and to bring us closer to Him. His plan for our life is that we love Him and love people, especially our family. 
Satan’s plan is to make us lonely and divided and always unsatisfied. We end up chasing after things. 

God’s plan is for us to pursue Him and pursue relationship. The opportunity to love God and each other is the reason God put you together. It doesn’t get any more complicated than that. 

Jimmy Evansas
„Marriage Today“ founder

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